Since you know my name is Sofia I guess you must be wondering where I came from. My family on my mother’s side can be traced back to the Native Americans that were first here. There is no better dinner conversation than talking about when one of our ancestors scalped an unsuspecting wagon train full of white settlers. My Dads side is even more interesting. Part German and part hillbilly. My Grandfather was German and his family migrated here. They separated and some went to Virginia. My grandmother was southern bred in Virginia where her family had lived for a very long time. They met and fell in love. They produced my father whom I sometimes affectionately refer to as the German Hillbilly. When people ask about my past I say “Blech “ because that is not who I am. Don’t get me wrong I love knowing where I came from but sometimes I really feel we spend too much time worrying about where we have been instead of focusing on where we are going.
When a child is born we do not speak of his past. We may mention he looks like so and so on someone’s side of the family but all in all we talk about his future. What will he be? Where will he go? What mark will he leave on the world? As we grow older we begin to make what is called memories and then we pine for them. It is human nature to look at the past more but when we do that we mar the future because we want a certain time or place. Your past is a part of you but it does not define you. Your future is precious and you can change it to what you want it to be. The future is an endless possibility of adventures and happenings. When we focus so much on the past we trudge along toward a future that may seem bleak. You cannot go back no matter how bad you want and no matter what has happened you can change your life. You can change where you are going. No matter what you have done in the past the future is a clean slate that only you can draw, color, or write. Life is too short to always be looking back.
As we get older our bodies cocoon our memories and in time we sift out the bad stuff. While that is good for healing it is also bad for moving forward. Remembering only the good numbs us and makes us think things were better than they were. Therefore when we get upset or see our future as dismal we want to go back to the synthetic past we have created. I am not saying everything about that time has been cushioned but if we are honest with ourselves we will notice that a lot of things we do not see as they truly were. That is what helps us heal from hurt, heartbreak, trauma, or even bad feelings. It is okay to do that and you should do that but it is not okay when the past ruins your future. It is hard to break that cycle, I know because I have been there. You can though, you really can. Look at your future the way you would a newborns. What will you do? Who will you be? What mark will you leave from here on out? Color, write or draw the future you want. Don’t let someone say you are too old, too poor, or anything like that. You are who you want to be. You are your history, your present, and your future. Own it like a boss (learned that from Bobbie, ha-ha) and fly. Then one day you can say “This is my history. This is my story. This is my future.”
My past is a part of me and I am sure I will talk about time to time but it does not define me. It makes me stronger and it made me learn. Where you are going is not defined by where you have been. It is defined by the amount of drive you have to take you where you want to go. I want you to do something for me. It's just a little something. I want you to take a piece of paper and I want you to write one goal for the future. It can be something as small as "Clean the basement" or something huge like " Buy a Car." I want you to put that goal somewhere only you know where it is. When you start looking to the past and getting a little sad I want you to pull it out and remind yourself that this is where you are going. If you go backwards you wont ever meet this goal. When you do meet that goal do it all over again. The point is keep moving forward. Every time you move forward you add a little more history to your story and then someday when you are close to your final curtain call you can look at the whole picture, smile and say " That was my history. That was my story. Damn, it was an awesome ride."
4 Friendly Notes:
Hey that is so weird, I'm German Indian also or Native American, whatever they are calling it now. My Grandpa is Cherokee I think mixed with German, but more Cherokee, you can tell, he's real dark. He isn't a Hillbilly though he is a Briar, lol. He owns a furniture store here and does commercials and it's pretty embarrassing when people find out I'm his grand daughter. So your grandpa is a German Hillbilly and mine is a Cherokee Briar.
Anyway, awesome blog. My name is Sarah, I found you at Hoppin Weekend and I'm following via GFC, Twitter, Pinterest and Facebook. I would love for you to stop by and if you want you can follow too.
http://skylarinc.blogspot.com/
Thanks and have a great weekend:)
Sarah
it's nice to have found such a heart warming and caring blog.
Good Morning Skylar :) That is so interesting! I love this because you never know who you are going to meet that may have something in common with you! I am sure Bobbie and Cissy are following you back. I am still new to all this blog stuff but I am definitely going to go look at your blog. It is so very nice to meet you and I hope you will come back and read more!
I think our histories are such a fun subject! Nice to meet you.
Sandy
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